I haven't fallen in love yet or maybe I did. I really don't know. I'm only twenty two, the baby of the family as being the youngest, but that doesn't stop me from wanting it so badly.
As long as I can remember I've always been searching for "the one." Romance novels, disney fairytales, and Hollywood chick flicks have put images of white knights and prince charmings in my head that realistically don't exist. Alas the hopeless romantic, emphasis on hopeless, LOL! Not really that hopeless at all. I am just thinking can I ever meet the man that I would soon be spending the rest of my life with, when will it be and how? And more importantly in his heart, was choosing me the best choice he has ever made? So many questions that I have set my eyes peeled in case one magically walked through a magic mirror into this world searching for me too.
I have a need. A need to write it down, to get my feelings on this paper so I have something that I can hold on to. Because I am confused, so very confused, wandering around a dark room not knowing why or how I ended up in it. Like a cliché. So many stories that I read are applicable to mine, but still I feel a need to write my own story down, a substitute is just not good enough.
I can’t get the hang of this. I’ve been typing and erasing and can’t decide how to write so I don’t know how it will turn out. My story is confusing, especially to me. You see, everything we’ve been through, it’s so baffling, intertwined and complexly stretched out that I can’t even put it into words.
As long as I can remember I've always been searching for "the one." Romance novels, disney fairytales, and Hollywood chick flicks have put images of white knights and prince charmings in my head that realistically don't exist. Alas the hopeless romantic, emphasis on hopeless, LOL! Not really that hopeless at all. I am just thinking can I ever meet the man that I would soon be spending the rest of my life with, when will it be and how? And more importantly in his heart, was choosing me the best choice he has ever made? So many questions that I have set my eyes peeled in case one magically walked through a magic mirror into this world searching for me too.
I have a need. A need to write it down, to get my feelings on this paper so I have something that I can hold on to. Because I am confused, so very confused, wandering around a dark room not knowing why or how I ended up in it. Like a cliché. So many stories that I read are applicable to mine, but still I feel a need to write my own story down, a substitute is just not good enough.
I can’t get the hang of this. I’ve been typing and erasing and can’t decide how to write so I don’t know how it will turn out. My story is confusing, especially to me. You see, everything we’ve been through, it’s so baffling, intertwined and complexly stretched out that I can’t even put it into words.
As my first semester in my fourth year at law school comes around the corner, I cannot help but think "will he be in this room?", as I walk into new classes; a clean slate, they don't know me and I don't know them.
Believe it when it's said, I'm not desperate nor do I need a boyfriend. Believe it when it's said, I just want to know what it feels like, to have someone in which you can be 100% yourself, that will love all your flaws as you love his or hers.
You see I am a sucker for books, and sappy stories, though I do not like showing it sometimes. Both happy endings and tragic endings appeal to me because the characters in stories always feel something nonetheless.
So I'm terrified that I'll be one of those girls who never falls in love because it hasn't happened yet. I don't exactly know if falling in love is the same with falling in like. It's quite a broad concept. I'm also terrified that I'll be one of those girls who falls for anyone just to see if love could be found there.
Who will love the girl who loves getting lost in a book, chasing those fantasies that only exist in her mind?
Who will love the girl who suddenly gets quiet because she got a bad vibe, so it ruins her whole day?
Who will love the girl who gets lost is her train of thoughts and will never be able to tell you why she got lost in the first place?
Who will love the girl who yearns for those midnight talks about life and what it has to bring?
Who will love the girl?
I know that I'm not the only one out there who feels this way. Younger, older, wiser: there are many of us. It's a scary concept, love, but I still want to feel it.
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